As the days passed since my friend left...I had a lot of time to think about my situation. There had been so much activity prior, that my thoughts and prayers with quality of "quiet time" had been robbed. I knew that this was a vital time for me..one for renewing my strength of faith.
I bought a little gate to put in front of the children's room so that they wouldn't run around the house while I was reading my Bible. They didn't mind since they could still peek out and see Mommy in the kitchen. Our children were well behaved and understood the importance of Mommy and Daddy being able to read their Bibles.
The two eldest were now on a regular schedule with school, thanks to Claudine. And, thankfully one of the classes for First Grade was right across the street. One daughter was able to walk to school and the other caught a bus across the street to attend class in another village a few minutes aways. God had provided our home in the perfect location! Several children in the village had already gotten to know my children and so with "friends" they attended their proper village class. The teacher's my children had were wonderful women and very understanding. My girls were still learning French and struggling with this on top of learning the normal education courses. But, in a short time they were so fluent that in town people knew exactly what village they lived in! What a help they were to me also. It amazed us how quickly children adapt. Before learning French, they still played with the village children, swinging, swimming, racing cars, riding bikes. No language barriers for them. Oh, how I wished I could have just soaked in the language like a sponge!
But, for now...my time in God's Word was more important than studying a new language. I felt the weakness of the flesh coming on strong. Questioning my own abilities to perform for my handicap son and my other children. I read the book of JOB over and over. I was reminded of the time many years prior in my youth as a babe in Christ; asking my Pastor...
"WHY?, did this happen to Job?"
He then did a Bible study on Why The Righteous Suffer. He pointed out the verses such as:
Job 1:1 There was a man...named Job; and that man was perfect and upright, and one that feared God, and eschewed evil.
Job 1:7-8 And the Lord said unto Satan, Whence cometh thou? Then Satan answered the Lord, and said, From going to and fro in the earth, and from walking up and down in it. And the Lord said unto Satan, Hast thou considered my servant Job, that there is none like him in the earth, a perfect and upright man, one that feareth God, and escheweth evil?
If you read the rest of the chapter you find that God allows Satan time with Job..testing his faith with sore trials...however, his life is in God's hand.
Job 2:1 says AGAIN...and these verses are repeated...yet in verse 3 it is added...and still he holdeth fast his integrity, although thou movedst me against him, to destroy him without cause.
Satan accuses God of building a hedge around Job and then accuses Job that if God were to touch Job's flesh he'd curse God....and so God gives Satan permission.
WHY? you'd ask...to prove the strength of his faith and belief in God. To prove Satan and his followers are without power. To magnify the GOD of Heaven and that no matter the trials we go through, GOD is our strength, he is our helper in time of need, he knoweth the end of the matter. We must remain faithful.
Job 12:9-10 Who knoweth not in all these that the hand of the LORD hath wrought this? In whose hand is the soul of every living thing, and the breath of all mankind.
As you read the book of Job you find that his faith though at times weak..he still sinned not, nor charged God foolishly.
He even examined himself...Chpt. 31:24-28 If I have made gold my hope, or have said to the fine gold, Thou art my confidence; If I rejoiced because my wealth was great, and because mine hand had gotten much; If I beheld the sun when it shined, or the moon walking in brightness: And my heart hath been secretly enticed, or my mouth hath kissed my hand: This also were an iniquity to be punished by the judge: for I should have denied the God that is above.
Job knew his God. Chapter 23:10 But he knoweth the way that I take: when he hath tried me, I shall come forth as gold... (the value)
I Peter Chpt. 1:7 That the trial of your faith, being more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tired with fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ...
And though Job was a righteous man, he still knew as we do..we are sinners saved by the grace of God and that any righteousness we have is His bestowed upon us by the redemption found at Calvary. In chapter 41 Job confesses his knowledge of this...and in chapter 42 he also acknowledges God's greatness. Verse 5 became very special to me. (you might note here by now...that Stephen was born in my 5th pregnancy, and was my 5th child born...I have noted numerous verses with the number 5 as well)
Job 42:5 I have heard of thee by the hearing of the ear: but now mine eye seeth thee.
As I read in my quiet time often these words and others found in the scriptures; I did find hope and strength.
The last chapter 42 also says in verse 12...So the Lord blessed the latter end of Job...
So much comfort found in the scriptures. A treasure chest of wealth! I found there strength, hope, courage, comfort, and love.
It is quite noteworthy that after the book of Job..and his trials...comes the Book of Psalms. Praises to our God! Psalm 136...each verse ends with...for his mercy endureth forever.
My quiet time...a precious time.