Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us.Unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. AMEN. Ephesians Chpt. 3 verse 20-21
Another day...another weakness in my flesh...but strength in the Spirit.
As the above verse states. HE is able to do above all that we ask or think. And so, my prayer to God continued: asking him to help me in my weakness; those times, when my heart ached, my stomach was in knots and fears compassed me.
How I thanked God for sending Kathryn to befriend me... A NURSE...oh of all people!
The very person who's words encouraged me.
"Oh,(Hope) you can do it again... You did much better than some students I've watched...GOD did indeed help you didn't he!"
The nurses warned me before I proceeded for the second time: that the tube can be inserted incorrectly and enter his lung, causing him breathing problems and his coloring turn black. (this had happened already with the nurses). It overwhelmed me hearing this. I couldn't let the nurses know that my heart at that moment: literally ached. They had to tell me. They had to inform me of every little thing that could and would go wrong.
"I must do it again...poor little guy...he needs to be home."
The nurse brought in a stroller so I could take Stephen for a walk around the hospital grounds. It would be our first time...all alone.
One of the nurses walked with me to the elevator and then to the front entrance. I thanked her and then...Stephen and I...together... took our walk in the sunshine of a beautiful fall day.
As I walked... I spoke with Stephen telling him how much we loved him, about his brothers and sisters and what it would be like to be home. I also spoke with the LORD. Thanking him for all he had already done for me. The comfort his word brings to my heart. I thanked him for giving us his word so that we can have assurance and know him.
I began to recall in my thoughts the years prior and how GOD had strengthened me then and shown his will.
In 1979 my first son was born with jaundice and I remember how helpless I felt. I didn't know at the time, how common this condition is: especially in boys. Because he was allowed to go home and released from the newborn nursery; when his test result numbers were to high, he had to be readmitted to a regular hospital room. I had to stay with him and watch him while he was under a special lighted isolet. Oh, the trauma for me then; seeing my new baby having to have special care.. his eyes had to be covered with little patches and the nurses would come in to prick his tiny feet. I cried. But, he would be fine and go home in a couple of days.
Then this same son at six months old developed a virus with a vey high fever and was admitted to the hospital. The doctor had him put into a crib with an oxygen tent and said that we would first try antibiotics and if his fever did not go down, he'd do a spinal tap. I tried to calm my son the best I could and soon he fell asleep. The nurses checked on him often and since I was to be there overnight in his room; I made myself comfortable in a recliner provided and began to read my Bible.
After being settled in...I overheard a doctor talking to the patient on the other side of the separating curtain. An elderly lady who was being told how to give herself injections for diabetes. I could hear the fear in her voice as she asked him questions. The doctor sounded very clinical. I felt so sorry for her. When the doctor left, I peeked around and asked if I could speak with her. She smiled and obliged, so I took my Bible and began to encourage her in the LORD and read some scriptures. I then left my Bible with her for the night. The next morning her son came in and after visiting with his mother, asked to speak with me... he said:
"I want to thank you for talking with my Mother last night. You helped her so much! She has been up all night reading the Bible and found so much comfort that now, she says she has the courage to do the injections by herself. Thank you so much!"
She was being released to go home and before leaving thanked me and returned my Bible. Just a short while later, my doctor came in for his routine stop and informed me that my son's fever was gone: the meds worked and he could go home today!
PRAISE THE LORD!!
THAT is why I was here....for that sweet little lady! What comfort came to my heart, knowing it was all part of GOD's plan.
Now the God of all peace, that brought again from the dead our Lord Jesus, that great shepherd of the sheep, through the blood of the everlasting covenant,Make you perfect in every good work to do his will, working in you that which is wellpleasing in his sight, through Jesus Christ; to whom be glory for ever and ever. AMEN. Hebrews Chpt.13 verses 20-21
As I recalled this...I could now plainly see, how GOD so graciously had prepared me for the present. A little strengthening here and there: the purpose shown and a blessing in the end.
Stephen and I had walked the perimeter of the hospital and now back to the entrance, I took him upstairs and prepared myself for the next lesson. I bathed him and inserted the tube as the nurses watched over...
and all was well...once again.